Tuesday, August 14, 2018

It's a Good Thing

I didn't start this blog because I thought I'd gather a lot of readers. It was mostly a way for me to cope with my sudden hearing loss and find my way in this almost deaf life I've found myself in. Today is the 6th anniversary of that dreadful day canyoubelieveit? Some friends have read my posts from time to time and left kind and supportive comments here and on my Facebook page. Occasionally a stranger makes a comment that lets me know that it is read at times beyond my little place in this world.

Recently, such a person contacted me to let me know that she herself has had hearing loss. She is a teacher and will begin teaching this year. Understandably, she is nervous about what to anticipate as she begins this step in her own almost deaf life. Finding someone who has walked that path before her, she wanted advice on things she could do to make the transition easier and less stressful.

Honestly, it's going to give her a lot of stress, I know. It's not easy. And she will find herself in many situations that she couldn't possibly anticipate. And she will have to find her way. Like I did. Like I still do today.

The thing is, hearing loss is tough. And many of the things one encounters day to day cannot be anticipated until they happen and you find yourself side-stepping, shuffling, fumbling, and adapting. And you do so because you really don't have any other choice if you want to continue living in this world. A sense of humor helps. So does honesty -- and a bit of frankness. If you're having trouble hearing or understanding, you have to speak up and let people know. Or you'll find yourself nodding and smiling that doofus smile. You have to be your own advocate.

I'm better about that now than I used to be. I still get a lot of "never mind" and "it's not that important" and those dismissals still hurt my feelings. But I confess that I've ignored people on occasion and blamed it on my hearing loss. No one is a saint.

I've committed to a long term sub position for several weeks. I'm a little nervous about returning to the classroom. And this one is an open classroom, so the fear of extraneous environmental noise is giving me a little anxiety. But I've learned the fear in the anticipation is usually greater than the reality. So I'll enter this assignment prepared to side-step, shuffle, fumble, and adapt as I have before. I've become resilient that way.

And it's a good thing.




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